end of the world party

packing for me comes in stages... first comes a list of what i need to bring back. and somewhere between deciding which pair of black pumps i wanted to bring up...i began to wonder...

what SPF sunscreen will protect me from the firey abyss i am about to return to?

and my little brother has off from school this week for spring break. and because of his...shall we call them insecresions...is grounded. and there is no way he can get out of it because mother is going to be home both days. so there will be no real escape from his 15 (yeah...i found out he's 15--not 16. whoops.) year old angst. and i think just because he HAS to stay home, he is going to try to make it as miserable for everbody around him. but, can you really blame the kid?

running the college dems table earlier was actually really fun. i met this incoming freshie and she was really happy i could pronounce her name (ayelet -blessing in hebrew- also my cousin's name) and she was really shy but i think i got her to open up. she's not really political but wants to become more active...which is really good. i mean, she's young...cant even vote yet.

but this morning, i went to brunch with anora. somthing they didnt tell you---admitted students days ALWAYS have the best food! and i was starting to feel kind of dizzy when i stood up from not eating so i figure...dying pretty is always good but i'm just not pretty enough yet. anyways...all of the kids and their families were in the dining hall. and we just sat there...trying to figure what architype each kid fit in to. i know it's superficial, but you can tell a lot about people by their facial expressions, attire and how they interact with the environment they are in.

and then this afternoon when i met a lot of the kids...i'm happy to say that i was right! this one kid...my friends and i nicknamed him "awkward bunny" cuz he's like 6'3" easy and lanky as all hell and has the tiniest head ever and kind of loafs along...he came to my table and it was so cute. he was so shy. but, from what i got out of him, he seems like he is a pretty genuinely nice kid. if he comes here next year, i'm going to have to look out for him....kids like that are so easily manipulated. usually by people like me.

and there was the mothers...oy vey. i was talking about college dems to this one mom and her kid and the mom...in the middle of my spiel yelled at her daughter for not standing up straight. i felt so bad for her. freaking authoritaritan whores. and there are the moms who think they still are in college. i was right next to the cheer table and saw this one mom who dressed exactly like her daughter. cute on the kid but wayyy gross on the mom. i mean...i'm all for self-expression and that good stuff but there reaches a point where you shouldnt walk around in a bright pink cami with a micro mini. especially with your daughter. i mean...have some self-resepect. what kind of an example are you giving your daughter if you dress like a whore. especially at somthing like this.

i think though...i'm pretty much over the drama here. wherever you go...people are going to talk shit about you. i mean, i'm not excluding myself from the shit-talkers but it just sucks that this is what we have resorted to. but i think the main difference between me and everyone else is that anything i say behind someone's back, i have no problem saying it to their faces.

i dont know...whatever.

i'm becoming into an early person. because i've been running every morning at 5, ive been waking up around 4 to have a quick shower to wake up and get caffinated to the point where i CAN run and not die. but this weekend...i decided i was going to sleep in till 7 and run then. didn't work so well. i was up at 430. after passing out around an hour prior. but...i still ran. and i didnt even set my alarm this morning.

i like being awake before everybody though. i can relax, have my coffee, maybe finish some reading for class or just read for fun. i love reading poetry in the morning...as the sun is rising...it's so relaxing. almost inspiring. i guess to see that regardless of all the crap going on...the sun will always rise. there will always be that one constant.

and ive been so much more productive. i guess because i'm awake, after my run and such...i have a few hours before class starts to do homework. and i dont feel like i'm as overburdened by my work. i mean, i'm taking 5 classes and writing and consulting and tutoring...but i like being busy. and the classes i'm in...i want to do the work. they all...for the most part...are on somthing i'm interested in so it's not that painful to do what i need to be preprared.

and running for me...i think it's theraputic. just leaving everything behind me, blocking out the world with my ipod and just letting go. i dont think. i just run.

as for the hour count till home...lets just say its 7 now...15 hours till we leave...18.5 hours till i'm in hell.