Monday, April 23, 2007

over

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I really dont. I feel like I have no direction anymore except down. Absolutly none. I have no idea what I want to do at all...not just in regards to work and the future but with everything.

The second I think I finally have a plan, somthing happens and it goes to hell. Like with my schedule...didn't get the courses I need for next semester. With work...score an amazing job but can't take it. With my major...think I want to work on the Hill but I'm not "Capital Hill Barbie". With my friends...think we're really good friends and I can trust them with anything and then they go and talk shit about me behind my back. With my schoolwork...I think my papers are somewhat decent and that I'm doing a decent job and then I get a freaking B.

(It's no coincidence that B is the second letter of the alphabet. Second. As in not first...not the best. Substandard.)

People might find a B to be an acceptable grade. But it is not. People don't get into grad school with Bs on their transcript.

I am DONE with this crap.

1 comment:

lifeline said...

Hey, couple of days back, you stopped by my blog and left a messege, thanks. I have been reading your blog since and I am really sad that you are in the middle of so much pain. Please please please remember that this phase will go away as soon as you feel a little happy - may be going outside, sitting in the sun or a park bench. Whatever you feel like. I have those days, and I think a lot of people have bad days. Please don't give up. Write whatever comes to your mind and I will try to read. If it is ok to comment, I can keep comenting as well. Feel better, ok. xoxo