Saturday, September 20, 2008

first time

I'm an escape artist, I've come to realize. When life throws me under the proverbial bus (or so it seems, even though most situations I get myself in are purely a result of my own selfish needs) I run away. Leave everything behind and try to begin anew. It's very immature of me to believe that wherever I run off to this time, my problems will remain behind... because they don't. I can't just escape and put a band-aid on the ouchie that moment of my life has become. 

I went down to Hood for a visit earlier this week and it was... surreal. Nothing had changed, whatsoever. Yes, the influx of bratty freshman and the destruction of all traditions that held the 200-year old school together remained intertwined amongst the pathways I wandered for the better part of the past two years. My friends were the same. Completely. Lily is still the overachieving, people-pleaser who's just too darn (because she would never grow the set big enough to allow her to say damn) scared to tell people how she really feels. Darrell is the male version of Lily, but he cusses like a sailor and still resents me. Logan is still my counterpoint to the ninth degree. And Mark... just laying there with him made time stop. I know it's the biggest cliche in the book but despite all the drama  we caused each other... I'm still sort of majorly in love. 

Sigh.....

2 comments:

Amrita said...

Hi lilith take care, Love, Amrita

Anonymous said...

If Lily was your pseudoname for me... then you're pretty accurate on those counts. And I just want to let you know- I've totally said "damn" before. :-)
-laura