runaway symphony

I'm now officially not going to be a member of the knocked-up college students club. Let's just rejoice in this for a moment. Cuz honestly, how bad would it be if I reproduced. Yeah. I don't even want to think about that. All that matters is that I'm not preggers!!! Woot!!!

...alright. Moment over.

The Renn poetry class wasn't working out for me so I'm in the process of dropping it. When it comes down to it, I don't need the credits and I was basically taking it to kill time and to say that I took a class with Sandona. Whatever. I have nothing to prove. I really need to focus on my Latin and other classes... And I want to be able to enjoy myself and not be stressed 24/7 like I was last semester. I mean, I'm still gonna stress myself out regardless but at least it will be self-contrived. For once.

I had a Creative Writing workshop last night... maybe I shouldn't have tried to quit smoking right before that class. Apparently they liked my offering but I don't know if they we're just being nice or what....because usually, even if the piece is exceptionally well-written, we tear it apart. But no, not with mine. This one girl, AJC, made a comment that it sounded...when she was reading it on her own...like it was written in my own voice-- not the "Lilith reading aloud in front of 15 people she doesn't know that well" voice. I don't quite know how to take that....or anything presented to me in workshop. I mean, this one is so different from the master class over the summer. Here, we've eliminated the strive for publication and are just focusing on the craft. It's just a totally different dynamic I guess. I know I need to work on my word choice-- I have an inclination to use the "five dollar words" way too much and it kind of muddles what I'm really trying to say. I know I need to work on showing not telling. I know I need to have more focus in my pieces....and basically just tighten everything overall.

I told Mike (Maryland Mike) that I want to have a talk with him. I really don't want there to be any animosity between us. It's not right. I know I messed that one up irreparably but he's a really decent person to hang out with and I think I'd like to salvage something for it...if that's at all possible. I don't know. Maybe because of Rosh Hashana I'm in a repenting mood...I don't know. But it's time for a change.